Fast forward to present - I've decided to visit my blog site again just to see if there's still traffic to it. And yes, it still has visitors every now and then. It's not much but still, it's nice to know that some people had been on my site. And then I decided to finally post this May 25, 2014 blog after all (I wrote it while I was in our laundry station around 11am or around noon time perhaps). I don't exactly know what for... but then again, for whatever it's worth or for everything it's worth. Anything that's about Gabriel shouldn't be put to waste; anything about him must be made relevant and worthwhile. Gabriel is my Angel. For these reasons and more, I'm sharing this. It is the last blog I've written about my journey with Gabriel when he was still mine.
------------ May 25, 2014
Finally! After 2 months and 19 days, 2 surgery residents, 2 orthopedic surgeons, splinting and casting, several x-rays and 4 consultations (among others); Gabriel's long-leg cast was finally removed. I can't help but look back at the journey through this chapter in our angel's life and mine, as a mother.
Another trial has been conquered.
Another difficult chapter has been closed.
After his cast removal, we went home - full of anticipation that happy days are here again.
Then came a shocking surprise.
... a seizure attack, followed by another and another...and another... i can't keep track of everything anymore. We were shocked and dead-worried for Gabriel's fragile leg which is not yet completely healed.
Through it all, I was just there, doing my role as a mother and making sure he's comfortable. And, protecting that precious leg which is still stiff, sore, swollen, and flaky-dry.
What now?
I accepted the challenge and did what I had to do. I spent these difficult days taking care of our precious angel - administering his medicines, feeding him, watching over him, comforting him and trying my best to be strong in what seems to be like a shocking "finale" of this chapter.
(It was indeed a shocking twist to what seemed like a good ending to a difficult chapter.) Bring it on!
And then I decided to do something which I hadn't done in quite a long time. I prayed.
But I won't elaborate on that. Moving on...
I don't know what went wrong but everything seems to be okay now. Finally. A lot of speculations, doubts and fears clouded my mind. But those weren't important anymore. Even the Stress. Pressure. Tension. Exhaustion. Just like what my husband and I always do... just move on; and expect for brighter days ahead regardless of how bad we feel and how hurt we are.
We have no other choice but to be hopeful. If not for hope, what else is there to hold on to? Nothing much.
And as for me, I'm doing my best to be strong. I don't want to break down and act like a desperate weakling. That won't help. I just need to be positive and to be strong - at all cost. I tried to hold on to that last ray of hope... and it worked. The storm has passed and happy days are here again.
And I wondered. Why can't things that are good just stay?
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